Are you?
Feeling unworthy can be rooted in many experiences we had as children, teenagers, or adults.
Not everyone who feels unworthy feels the same way, it all depends on where that feeling of exhaustion comes from.
Struggling to see anything through that overwhelming sense of indignity is incredibly exhausting. There are ways, though, that you can help yourself.
It’s time for you to enter into a new relationship with your mind and soul. Your true self is hidden there, ready to shine.
Explore some of the most likely reasons why you’re feeling unworthy and follow our advice on how to undo that feeling and find freedom.
5 possible reasons why you’re feeling unworthy
1. YOU HAVE HAD DISTANT OR DEMANDING PARENTS WHO HAVE NOT GIVEN YOU ENOUGH LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE
The feeling of indignity may be rooted in your mind and soul since you were just a child.
If your parents or caregivers were distant in some way (physically, emotionally, or psychologically), this may have made you not feel well enough.
Every good therapy session starts with a therapist asking questions about the patient’s childhood years and there is a good reason for that.
At a time when our minds develop and learn to deal with emotions, our surroundings play an incredibly important role.
Everything that happens in the first two years of our life is fundamental roots for the development of a person’s mental health.
His parents may have been loving and present, but very demanding during his adolescence and adolescence.
Constantly trying to fulfill all your expectations and demands and never feeling that you have managed to completely satisfy them, will make you feel unworthy.
2. THE PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE ARE JUDGMENTAL AND CRITICAL
Everyone seeks acceptance. It is our human need to want to be part of society, community, or group of any kind.
To feel that way, we are generally prone to adapt and change who we are to fit in.
Most of the time, a human being who is trying to change his essence to be accepted will develop the feeling of being unworthy.
What you are will always be a part of you, making you think you don’t belong.
Some people are always willing to cast their attitudes and opinions on others, offering little acceptance and much judgment and criticism.
There is a chance that you will be surrounded by family and friends (yes, they are usually your loved ones) who unknowingly make you feel less worthy.
In their minds, they are motivating you to become better, but what they are doing is ruining your self-esteem.
3. YOU ARE OVERLY SELF-CRITICAL
Frantically try to become the best possible version of yourself, then criticize yourself harshly whenever you make some kind of mistake – this usually causes low self-esteem.
It’s a positive thing to try to improve yourself, but judging yourself on a level that makes you feel less worthy is a problem.
You think your behavior and thoughts come from your honest desire to ensure your well-being, but not.
This need for perfection in everything you do is causing many negative emotions that, one by one, make your life a living hell.
Doubt leads to constant criticism in your mind, or even aloud, and this leads to hatred of yourself, a devastating emotion from which it can be difficult to recover.
4. YOU HAVE HAD TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCES
You have been abused emotionally, mentally, or physically by an unknown person, a parent, family member, or boyfriend/husband.
If there is a traumatic experience in your past, you can be almost sure that this is what is causing your feelings of indignity.
Every kind of abuse leaves a mark – a deep scar that can be on your body, your mind, or your soul.
Most of the time it’s in all three and it takes a lot of positivity, outside help, self-help, and strength to deal with it.
Going through abuse of any kind knocks down your self-esteem and makes you question everything about yourself, including your self-esteem.
5. YOU HAVE AN INININATO DESIRE TO MEET THE NEEDS OF OTHERS
There are people who, for one reason or another, seem to need to meet the needs and expectations of others.
No matter what else is happening in your life, they only feel good when needed and when they can respond accordingly.
If you are one of those people, finding yourself in circumstances of life in which you simply cannot satisfy a person (some people are impossible to satisfy) or are no longer needed, you will feel less worthy for not doing your job.
In addition, in the long run, constantly caring for others and never paying attention to your own needs will make you feel useless.
6 powerful ways to put aside feelings of unworthiness
1. ACCEPT YOUR EMOTIONS
The first step to solving a problem is to admit that you have one. Your emotions are important.
The way you feel isn’t shameful. Right now, it’s authentic and yours.
Accept it for what it is. Don’t try to beautify him in your mind.
Think about how you feel throughout the day and what triggers your feelings of unworthiness.
Try to connect these triggers to real motives (things that happened in your past) that made you question your self-esteem.
Connecting the dots will help you to be consciously in tune with what you are feeling and therefore will be a starting point to finding the way to freedom.
2. REVISIT YOUR ATTITUDES ABOUT YOUR PERSONALITY
If someone asked you now to talk about yourself, what would you say?
There’s a good chance your answer will be filled with many negative traits (at least in your mind, if you didn’t say them out loud).
We form our opinions about ourselves according to how other people respond to us. If you were surrounded by negative, critical, and judgmental people, the feedback you received was probably horrible.
If something traumatizing happened to you or your parents didn’t do a good job giving you love and acceptance, it also shaped the way you think about yourself.
Review those opinions.
Try to think of yourself in other terms, such as: being kind to others, succeeding in certain things, being funny, and being… whatever you are.
You’re not who they tell you you are, you’re who you are.
3. PUT ASIDE OTHER PEOPLE’S JUDGMENT ATTITUDES
Trying to carry the expectations that others put on your back is a difficult task. People judge us not based on who we are, but on who we are. Always remember that.
What someone thinks of you usually speaks a lot more about them than you do. Why is that? Because we see the world and other people through our experiences, emotions, and souls, not theirs.
Other people see only a small part of you and allow themselves to judge you and criticize you based on that. If what you do doesn’t match them, it just means you don’t suit them.
That doesn’t mean it shouldn’t suit you.
You make yourself. Put aside what others think of you, or worse yet, what you think they think of you.
4. THINK ABOUT ITS POSITIVE CHARACTERISTICS
The path to acceptance and self-love is long, and there are some important steps you must take.
One is to remember their strengths, talents, and virtues, and to be genuinely proud of them.
Think of positive things you’ve done that have brought about a change in someone’s life. Think of all the kindness and love you spread among others.
Find a way to remember that you have so many positive traits. Write somewhere or invent a personal mantra that speaks to you.
Say that every day for as long as you need. Learn to recognize your virtues as you recognize those of others.
Every success is important – celebrate them all.
5. ALWAYS TRY TO DO YOUR BEST
Over time, feeling unworthy can cause a person to stop trying. What that does is only makes things worse.
Whatever you do, always try to do it with as much energy, passion, and love as you can.
This will not only make your success more likely and therefore increase your low self-esteem but doing something with great care and involvement will make you feel stronger on your own.
Don’t do something simply to finish (unless it’s something you want to do). Try to get involved, especially when it’s something you love.
6. TAKE IT EASY, EVERYONE MAKES MISTAKES
Exercise self-compassion. No matter how good you are at something, you will make a mistake sooner or later.
It is absolutely normal and even necessary. Mistakes are our teachers.
When something like this happens, don’t immediately criticize yourself or accumulate negative emotions. Imagine it’s someone else who did what you did.
What would you say to them? I guarantee you’d be much more tolerant and less critical of who you’re not.
Apply the empathy, understanding, and compassion you are willing to give to others for yourself.
Realizing your self-esteem comes from loving yourself and loving yourself comes from accepting who you are – mistakes and everything.
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